Sex, Lies and Video Games

I figured I would start this new blog off by posting an ol' favorite, so here goes:

Okay, I have had enough. If one more person tells me that violent video games affected them and they think that that brings conclusive evidence to the table on why video games (especially violent ones) should be banned, I'm going to kick a baby in the face, right in the goddamn face. And not just any baby...I'm gonna find a cute baby, an honest to God cute baby (not one that the parents say is cute and everyone just agrees but later behind the parents' backs everyone is like "Wow, that baby was fucking ugly.") I mean a really cute baby, maybe one concieved by hot famous people that has a weird name like "Apple" or "Sherbert". Then I'm going to thrust my foot into it's face with a great amount of force caused by my leg muscles.

We've had enough! Stop blaming the video games for problems they aren't causing! "But Paladin, the kids from Columbine played "Doom" before they went and shot all those innocent kids." Good point douche-copter, did you know the other startling fact about Columbine? 10,234,845 other kids played "Doom" as well and didn't do shit. They went to school and thought up clever ways to get out of homeroom like the rest of us. Those two fags from Columbine were messed up to begin with. I'm sure they watched MacGyver every afternoon and jerked off too, but no one is boycotting that show.

We always look for someone to blame in every controversy and tend to overlook the real issue: Root out creepy kids. These kids were outcasts. Apparently, the rest of the school had figured out that they were kids that people should stay away from. If we can learn anything from tragic events like this, its that peer pressure is always right. Everyone is always right. If you are the only one against a certain issue....you are the one that is wrong. Get used to it.

Back to video games. I am not saying that video games were not involved, however, all I am saying that is that you cannot place the entirity of the blame on video games. I jerk off all the time.................is that Brooke Burke's fault? NO! but trust me, she's involved. Okay, so let's recap. Baby's beware, Macgyver is jerk-off worthy, I like Brooke Burke too much, video games=good, and peer pressure is always right. Alright, that about wraps it up and since I am always right, that's the way its gonna be. So go into the world my people and live in a world not so scared of Crash Bandicoot and his gang of multi-pixelled brainwashers. Live Free!